Strange Week

Well its been a strange week. It started with a mid week hook up with a high shool teacher who told me I was the best he had ever had fuck him, nice words, I didn't like him but, he has since been persuing me, the school teacher is chasing me..... lol. That same night a lebo personal trainer came over and sucked another load out of my cock and left. The next night a guy I have talked to for a long time as a friend on Grindr, he a super hot personal trainer from Kings Cross, suddenly decided that I was hot property and organized a meet up. I said "for coffee you mean?" no for sex silly, he said, oh I was shocked at my sudden raise of status in his eyes, and met him at Body line for a fuck, well several actually, he is a total bottom and into rape fantasy so I fucked him as hard as I possibly could for as long as I could and when we emerged a few hours later from our room there were at least 20 guys gathered around our room who had been watching or listening to us and started following us around. We showered together. The PT said to me "look you have a fan club" I said I think they might be for you. But he was right they were for me and follwed me around like I was the pide piper, I went into a room with the hottest one, a 6.3 French tourist with a big one. I was so fucked out from before I just had to bend over and cop it, cause my dick wasn't working any more. Its funny I think they must have been thinking that cause I could get a guy like the PT I must have been one hell of a fuck!!
I had dinner cooked for me by another leb guy I had no feelings for on FRiday night out west and Saturday night I broke in a 34 year old Leb guy visiting back from the mines in WA. He had a hot mate lieing on a matress on the floor of the lounge room of the hotel. I realised it was one of the frist grade West Coast egales players, who apprently like to play with guys, but the leb guy refused to let him join in because he was his flat mate....... BIG BOOOOO to that! The Leb guy was a big tough biker guy with Tatts and had been engaged before, and now at 34 had decided he was gay. It was fucking hot! after I popped his cherry, he decided that it was his turn and he was coked off his head and he fucked me for 2 hours! it hurt so much but he was fucking good at it so I had to let him go for it!

I didnt feel a thing for any of these guys despit their hottest factor. My Bondi Boy has my heart and I want it back!

Umm Limbo or Hell?

 

 

Some more pics of my guys porn twin, mmmm this just what he looks like as I make love with him. 

But in more sober news, I have zero idea what is going on between us.  We haven't seen each other in a month, but we talk every day??? what the fuck is that.  He isnt making time for me or any effort.  So its deffintaly all me.  My friends say dump him!! dump the fucker, he is a fuck wit!! he makes you feel like shit about yourself get ride of him!!  But on the plus side i have all ready lost 6 kg in 2 weeks, so his infulence on me is good, very good on some level.  I have had my whole life to get my weight and body image issues fixed and I never have, now I am doing something about it, a lot about it.
I talked to an old gay guy about us, he was very positive about us, apart from his drug use and him not making time for me.  But as he said, if I really do think he is the one, you put the work in, you give it 4 or 6 months to see if he can develop a relationship brain.  He is 2 years younger than me, my relationship brain only kicked in the first time at 31, and mid 32, maybe he needs some time to develop those feelings towards me.
I got myself to the point where I think, he does really like me he just likes being single, can't hate him for that, he is just being honest.  It hurts like crazy, but the main problem is that he is very good looking and im over weight, so he can find any one, and I can't my pool is very limited, hot guys who like big guys.

So we limp on, or I should say I limp on, and today I walked into a bar in the afternoon and he was there with all his mates, proberly coked off their heads, and I was alone, no friends would come and join me.  I couldn't go up to him, so I watched for a little bit, and left, he was looking like shit, which kind of made me feel a little better because now I know I will be hotter than him when im slim, but the feelings, oh the feelings, I felt terrible, what could it be?  I think it is so many things wrapped up into one, im on diet pills so I am anxious, and not eating.  to see the guy I want and not to get to touch him and hold him killed me.  My friends not being there for me.  Feeling lonely from working a 70 hour week.  But mainly, the feelings he had for me, where did they go? could he really have faked what we felt? it really scares me to think he could have.  Its so rare to find some one I like, so thats why I can't walk away from it.  How can he walk away from what we had that was so nice?? it kills me to think that that specialness has dissappeared.  One of the best expirences of my life, now doesn't exist?? how is that possible?
There may be some one better out there than him, it could be possible, I have to believe it is, but what we had was so amazing im not wishing for more or better because I dont see how its possible.  Its like I have become invisible to him, it could be the drugs, but how do I walk away from my peak expirence of love in my life?

HOT!!

http://www.givemegay.com/130693/hot-hunks-enjoy-arab-sex-fantasy.html?wmid=12&sid=0

This movie looks like me and my guy haveing sex, so I thought id share

The Fattie Stratagie

To get you up to speed the guy I was seeing, lets call him ramadan guy, my friends do, didn't come through, he never remade contact, which was harsh and nasty and would have been painful except around the end of ramadan I had a week of super hot fucks, the hottest of which, is in the top three hottest guys I have ever been with, and is in my top 20 hottest guys in Sydney.
We had been chatting on Grindr every night for three weeks and he kept booty calling me late on Sunday nights, I kept saying no, I finaly gave in and am I glad I did.  We fucked from 1:30 am on Monday morning through to 7:30 am that morning!  We had both blown at least 7 times and we had amazing sex.  He then ignored me for a few days, and I thought he was the type of guy I thought he was.  He then remade contact and we had a proper date the next week and I slept over on a Monday night.  We have great sex and intamacy, but he was not friendly or pleasant out of bed.  Not sure what to make of him, I thougth he was an hot arse hole, and I had no idea why he was fucking around with me, looking as over weight as I am atm.  We had a our first fight when I asked him to show some commitment.  We got over it and he came back stronger.  I had my brothers hugh fuck off mansion in the city all last weekend and we fucked all over his house all weekend.  I saw the first sign of attactment from him if ever so weak.  In lots of ways he is the best guy I have ever been with.  But only in some.  It took me a day and a half to process that weekend together and I came up trumps!!  I had him figured out and I was happy with what I saw.  He is one of those real trophy guys.  He told me a few things about himself which I wont repeat on here.  We text all day long every day, some times 40 or 50 a day.  We cuddle in each others arms all night long, he will never let me go, I love it.  When we do talk its interesting, but we don't talk very much.
I am so over weight at the moment 127kg!  And he used to be one Sydney's top strippers.  Huge miss match.  I know I am a nice guy, and a very decent fuck, he is bottom only.  I make a big effort with him.
So here are some of the stories I have told myself to keep myself calm while dating him.
I am a good looking guy, if I was able to loose the weight I would be more of a catch then him.
It would be nice if we worked out then I could honestly say he liked me before I was hot.
He told me is very impressed with me, and impressed that I put up with his High Matience ways, including coking off his head the first night we met, not that he would addmitt it for 3 weeks.
Last week we were up to a stage where we were playing a game called " You pretend im not fat and Ill pretend you are not an arse hole".  It works for us.  Not that we called it that, its just what I think was going on.
He motivates me, Ive been to the gym every day for a week and he is a carb nazi, so he helps me with my diet as well, only when I ask for help.
I asked him to show me a bit more possitive feed back, he told me he liked me and to work out in my own head that he did.  It took a day, but then I got it.  He does like me.  Fucking and sleep over is his way of showing love, I do it verbaly, he doesnt.
He is being clever, I am one of the best catches in Sydney, but I am over weight, maybe he can see that, and is a good enough guy to help be become the guy I have always wanted to be.  He does love me, he can see I don't love myself and is helping me become the guy that I can love too.  I am impressed because he is prepare to stick around for a work in progress, not after someone who is perfect already.
I am so happy.  Life is so good.

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Army Boys, Israeli Porn

http://gayfuck.tv/army-boys_33080.html

Update

I have a new belief in love.  Im energized by my new belief but will it hold up to any sort of test.  It has made me realize I am faithless, and I want something to believe in, Im just afraid that putting my faith in love and someone else is a pretty weak thing to have faith in.  I am Throwing out all my beliefs from formalized religion and holding them to the light for their true value. 

A few days from the end of Ramadan I am about to find out whether I have been dumped in a very bad way or whether the guy who I feel in love with, who I thought loved me back, or he has left me hanging for a month.  If  I have been dumped I will be upset, but life will go on, I learned that love existed from this expirence and that was great.
If my guy comes back to me, I'm not sure how to turn an intense love into a relationship.  He didn't treat me very well by not speaking to me for a month.  I also feel that he puts me about number 6 on his prority list which needs to change for me to hang about.
But he has the X factor that I have never found in anyone before, I will miss him a lot if I have to walk away.  He says he wants to be in a relationship with me, but his actions dont match his words.  But our sex is the best ever and he is the sexiest guy I have nearly ever been with.

My coping stratagy is to get super hot at the gym so I can date a different pool of guys that I dont have access to at the moment. And I guess hope to god that I can meet some one who has simular great values as this guy.

I know how to attract hot guys with muscles but I don't know how to find love again.  I guess luck or fate will have to decide that.