Jesus may have once said that the whole world would fit in the palm of his hand, but I doubt very much my balls would. They are enormous at the moment. I have always been very well endowed in the sack department, but today they are positively…. well I don’t know what they are other than impressive. No one has ever been able to fit them both in their mouth at the same time, and today I can’t even get them both in one hand. It may have something to do with the large amounts of steroids I am on for my lungs; yes I have pneumonia again, but only one lung this time….. yay for small graces, but I thought steroids made ones balls smaller, thats what we were taught at school in health and fitness education. I was also having a big dick day, I love it when my penis needs both hands to be taken care of. If any ladies are reading this, you may not know that a man’s’ penis changes size from day to day. It may be fully erect, but for example my fully erect can be up to 2 inches difference in length depending what day it is. It has to do with diet and stress. Coffee is a constrictor as is menthol, so any breath mints or cough lollies make it smaller. One Lebanese man once said that he couldn’t wait to fuck me after a glass of red wine, he was already big, like 8 inches and with a fat girth, but he said that after red wine it grew another inch!!
I guarantee you that I only went to Body Line tonight because I have been feeling terribly sick and unable to work, and BL is my cheap version of a day spa, I feel pampered and much better after a long spa and chilling out listing to the awesome music they play there. MR_Soul was there tonight, and I wanted to tell him that I had written about him, but attraction is such a fickle thing, it didn’t seem right to tell him, even though I talked to him twice , but I definitely wasn’t up for love making as I was feeling terrible and I have him on a pedestal at the moment. I don’t want to ruin it with medioca sex.
After a few hours I was starting to feel better and gave in and did a 3 way with a South African couple. One was black and one was white. I think this is the first time I have ever been a guest star in a relationship, and to top it off it was with ebony and ivory, but I was so bored. How over sexed must I be when I have just had two firsts like that and I’m bored.
After my day spa session I went to get some food and someone taped me on the back and I spun round and this cute young man who had been sitting at the bus stop had followed me up the street and said “Hi, would you like a blow job?” in the middle in the street at only 12:30 pm on a Wednesday. So ok it was Oxford Street, but am I really giving off that much sexual power that guys feel the need to fall to their needs and service me? Come to think of it maybe he was a hooker trying to drum up business. Either way I smiled in shock and delight and said “no thank you”. If he only knew what Olympic sex feats I had just been pulling off, I was exhausted.
Today is the day after Melbourne Cup and there is cool wind blowing, it’s so nice and refreshing and as I was walking up South Dowling Street back to my ute, the street was deserted and quiet, I had the first feeling of peace in the city I have ever felt in the 3 years of living in Sydney. It was as peaceful as when I used to go for walks around O’Malley and Isaacs back in Canberra in the pine forest and over the reserve at Mt Mugga Mugga. And as the wind rustled through the beautiful fresh green Maple tree leaves on South Dowling Street, with the street light making the leaves glow green, I had a comforting thought. The sudden cool snap made it feel like autumn had arrived out of nowhere and that there had been a change of season. And this feeling of a change of season made me think that when it is time to settle down there will be a change as dramatic in me, and that I am not being silly living this sexually free, I felt like I was having a little natter with God and he/she was telling me that the sexual freedom that I have been living and exploring the past decade was his gift to me. Other people get bogged down in things like mortgages and career paths and relationships and children. I have none of these at 30 and feel left behind some times, but I truly feel that I was shown how lucky I am tonight. Anyway it felt nice to be happy with my lot in life and not anxious about missing out and falling behind due to my own choices.
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