Bodyguard Crush

If I ever have money one thing I want to do is interview the hottest body guards in Sydney and pick one to be my personal body guard.  I am in no danger, but I have a fantasy about choosing the hottest tough guy I can find in Sydney and paying him to protect me.  Take me shopping, go to restaurants, go to night clubs and just have this strapping man there to protect you.  And in my fantasy he would gradually warm to me, he would most probably be straight, but may be with a deep dark secret that only my friend ship ignites the deep longing and passion in side him.  And maybe ex-military as well, having served time in Iraq, he has come back to Sydney a damaged man, with emotional issues that sometimes when I catch him off guard, like when he is sitting on the end of my bed (who knows why he would be sitting on the end of my bed) I find him crying, as he is trying to process the pent up feelings inside him.  He wears dark glasses and dark suits and some time a little tear will run down his face from behind his dark sunglasses as he works through the pain inside.  He is no longer fit for duty due to his war trauma, and through my warmth and friend ship he learns how to reconnect with the civilian world and feel love again.  He starts to hang out with me outside the hours I pay him, and before long he is calling me to hang out.  He of course feels safe around me because I tell him I am gay, and that I only hired him because of his brooding good looks.  He hasn’t been able to find a woman who can heal his pain like I can, and he finds himself wanting to sleep over in my bed because he lost his close male friends when he left the army and he doesn’t get to sleep next to them anymore.  He starts sleeping over in my bed every night and he holds me tight, and some nights he wakes up screaming but he isn’t embraced by his night terrors because he knows I don’t care, and gradually they happen less and less.  He starts asking me to go camping with him, like they did in the SAS (the elite fighting unit of the Australian Army) and when we are camping in the mountains, I kind of realize that he hasn’t been out of my life or bed for several months now, he has basically moved in without me realizing because it just happened so naturally I didn’t even register it was happening.  He tells me under the stars that he has found true love for the first time with me, and I realize that I have nursed a very tough man back to mental health and I am happy that I was able to help one of our fighting men.   But now that he is well again I’m not sure where his true orientation lies as he is very straight in so many ways, was he only gay when he was emotionally wounded?